When things go wrong...

Arguments happen. It makes, and sometimes breaks a relationship. I am guilty. Sometimes, I get too serious on things, I over analyze.

We've had our fair share of misunderstandings, arguments, tampuhan, and huge fights this past several weeks. I don't know how it all happened and started - all I know is that I'm guilty for the most part of it. Sometimes, I tend to think only about myself. I can be to selfish that I would [always make it to a point] to blame someone for all that's happening.

BUT BIEN made me realize that a woman's greatest strength - is to know all her weaknesses - her MAN. I love him so much that every time we get ourselves into a fight, I get paranoid - I am so scared to lose him. I can't be more blessed for having him as my husband. He [always] tries to understand. He, despite of having frustrations on how to deal with me, would always find away to get into the heart of the matter. He is the most understanding person I've ever known. He has lots of patience in me - making me feel guilty when [I know] I made a mistake.

This Christmas, I am again most thankful to God that I am spending this special day with him. I can't be more happy that I married Bien. I know he's been putting a great amount of effort to fulfill our vows - to love and cherish me for the rest of his life. He loves me so much and that I can proudly tell to the whole world. I AM LOVED BY  A GREAT MAN WITH GREAT PATIENCE AND UNDERSTANDING. These are no-sugar coated words. I am simply telling a fact about my husband. When this time of the year comes, I get the chance to thank God for giving him to me. He is my most precious gift - apart from my two children, Saab and Ccino.

Hon, I know you'll get to read this. I love you and I'm sorry for being such a headache sometimes. Thank you for your understanding. Thank you for your patience. Thank you for not letting me walk out of the door when we're in the middle of an argument. Thank you for you great love. and thank you for all the compromises you've made - for me. 

Relationship in marriage, is after all about forgiveness - of learning in each other's mistake - of listening to what the both of you have to say -

All the things I thought I knew, I'm learning them again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness

These times are so uncertain
There's a yearning undefined
And people filled with rage
We all need a little tenderness
How can love survive in such a graceless age
And the trust and self-assurance that lead to happiness
They're the very things we kill,

        Better put it all behind you; cause life goes on        
       You keep carrin' that anger, it'll eat you up inside 

                            -Heart of the Matter by India Arie